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Writer's pictureDanny Fisher

Dave Portnoy Is The Man Responsible For Destroying Ohio State

Dave Portnoy is one of the most incredible humans ever to walk this earth, and I'm not being a total idiot when I say that. This man won the baseball Triple Crown, and if it weren't for a shoulder injury, he probably would be in Cooperstown today. 


He also took Barstool Sports from nothing, sold it twice for over 500 million dollars, and repurchased it for a dollar. He is the most influential person in the world regarding pizza. 


It would be easiest for me to say the things he can't do because this would be a very short article, and we could all go home, but even the thing I thought he would never be able to do, he does, and that is destroying the Ohio State football program. 


Portnoy went to school at Michigan, and ever since 1999, it has been a hard road for the Wolverines. They could never beat Ohio State, never play in any meaningful games, and couldn't find them anywhere close to the College Football Playoff. 

Ohio State Is Dead

The last three years, however, have been a nightmare for the Buckeyes, losing to Michigan three straight years in a row and losing in the playoffs against Georgia when they led almost the entire game. Now, they have no pulse against Missouri in the Cotton Bowl.  


Portnoy has declared the Ohio State football program DEAD! and is 100% correct. 


You think after losing to Michigan in 2021 and then getting blown out at home the following year, you would go into the third game against an interim head coach and try to put up a fight. 


I don't care that Ohio State only lost by a touchdown; they never controlled the game once, and some people who work for Mr. Portnoy said it was a coin-flip game; you could flip that coin 100 times, and it would land on Michigan all 100 times. 



Ohio State is dead, and after that embarrassing game against Missouri in the Cotton Bowl, it's time to bury them in the ground, put dirt over them, pick out their tombstone, and lay them to rest because the Ohio State era as we know it is gone. 


Don't get me started with them; they dealt with the second-and third-string quarterbacks in the Cotton Bowl. Tom Brady wouldn't even have a chance with that garbage offensive line.


This has been an issue for three years, and it seems never to want to be fixed. 


Ohio State fans should get used to this because this team is going nowhere as it is currently constructed.  




Michigan is about to play for a spot in the title game, and Ohio State needs help figuring out how to score a touchdown in a bowl game; that means nothing. 


These two programs are not the same at the moment, and the only hope Ohio State has is if Michigan gets the death penalty for cheating. 


I'm never going to doubt Portnoy ever again. The man killed a college football program that I never thought could be taken down, but he found a way to do it. 


The man has won six Super Bowls, taken down Commissioner of the NFL Roger Goodell, has a perfect golden brown cookie tan, and destroyed the biggest college football brand in the world. 



Portnoy even rooted for Ohio State to beat Missouri for the Big Ten, and they couldn't even give him the win. Ohio State is now Portnoy's puppet, and he keeps pulling the strings and making them dance. 



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